There truly hasn't been much worth sharing lately. We've been working and playing, and leaving the cleaning for later (ugh).

Wednesday, Mike's oncologist informed us that his kidneys are handling the chemo quite well, and they wanted to increase the amount of Oxaliplatin that they're giving him. The "normal" dose for his height and weight would be 200mg. He's been getting 100mg. They changed it to 125mg and already his side effects have increased. He's more tired this round, and also the cold sensitivity has appeared. the doctors have told us that patients have described it as though when drinking anything cooler than room temperature, it feels as though they are drinking a glass of broken glass. So far it's not that bad, but he said that his tongue feels tingly and his lips felt as though the milk was freezing as he drank it. Not cool. But better than cancer, I guess. We just have to wait 2 weeks to do another blood draw to find out if his kidneys are okay with this. They're not clearing the meds out as quickly as they would if they worked normally, so he actually has the crap in his body longer than most people would. Awesome. But his blood counts look good still. He is still slightly anemic but they attribute that to the chemo. It will be good to see that go away when this is all done, since that was our first clue that something was wrong..

So that's the cancer news. All is well as well can be for now. After his last treatment (December 1) they will begin scheduling CT scans and more blood work. Since he can't do CTs with contrast, there may be a few MRIs thrown in there. Yipee. But if everything goes according to plan, after March or so, the most annoying thing we'll have to deal with is doctor visits and shoveling snow.

It's a really beautiful morning. It was a little rainy last night so there is still cloud cover and the smell of freshness. It feels like camping weather.

It's been too long since I've posted. Of course things have been going on, but I've been busy doing them and not writing about them. Someday I will be better at the blogging of our lives. Right now we're just living them instead.

Today has really been an off day for me. I've felt as though I was under water. Everything seemed blurry and muffled. It's strange what it takes to make that go away.

It started with a 20 minute listen to Glenn Beck. I have always found him entertaining, and most of the time I find him frightening. He speaks in a way that grabs you by the throat. All of his rants on politics I normally listen to with only one ear. I think it's all (mostly) true, but I can't concentrate on the world falling apart right now. I just can't. I have to focus on rainbows just to keep sane. But today he started telling a story and got sidetracked. He began talking about how he tries to be a good man and lead a good, decent life. And how We ALL need to begin to stop being the people we've let ourselves become and start being the people we truly are. How we need to be better people who are WORTHY of the blessings we have. That really hit me. I am a good person. I am flawed, and I will never be perfect. But I am good. But I need to be better in order to really show how thankful I am for what I have. He said we need to stop doing the things that destroy us and our families. I know he was talking of much bigger things, but I know that there are simple things that I can do, and I will start today. i want to be worthy.

I can't believe how time is flying. It's closer to August than June. Soon we will be panicking over Christmas again. Another chemo week is gone, and it wasn't a horrible one. Rik (Dr. Chandramouli's PA) told us that sessions 1-5 are going to be a breeze but 5-8 will be horrible (yay) and after that it even out again. We'll see. Mike is stronger and more amazing than I'd ever realized.

We're deep in the middle hell of Summer. I think it's been 100+ for 5 days in a row. Our a/c (evaporative cooler) is working hard, but some days it still feels like the indoors are outdoors. Yuck. But too soon it will be October and Halloween and November and Thanksgiving.. I know everyone says the same thing, but how weird that the older you get the faster time goes by. My baby will be 3 in 5 months. 3.

A little overdramatic, I suppose.

Today my plan is to stay inside. 96 degrees is too many degrees, as my friend Stephanie would say. Sophia is currently carrying around her cell phone like a baby and saying, "shhh, it's okay." Maybe it was the corndog I fed her for breakfast (hey, she also had 1/2 an orange!) Yo Gabba Gabba is on tv, and it's Dancey Dance Time! Glitter hands!! Go Leslie!

I should be doing something productive. Sewing, cleaning, sleeping.. Instead I've been browsing blogs all morning. Craft blogs mostly. There's a lot of cool stuff out there that I don't know how to do, or would screw up big time if I did. But I'll keep looking.

Hopefully we will be able to make a quick trip to California next month to see the ocean (and Jer and Wyatt, duh!). But if not, the ocean will be there next year.. Or whenever we get our bills paid.

As usual, I spoke too soon. Mike was very sick all day. And he hasn't even started this week's chemo. I hate cancer.